CityMama™

I bought some vegan caviar from http://www.caviart.us/ after reading about it on several food blogs. I got two kinds, the black and the one that looks like ikura (salmon eggs). It arrived in containers packaged just like regular caviar. It also looks amazingly like real caviar. Going to serve it over the holidays, Will report back.

Dancing but not letting go (not just yet)

I've written before about how we tend to keep our kidlets a little sheltered.  They are five and seven and there's plenty of time for growing up. J. has been finding random videos of the girls when they were littler and they are so sweet and tiny, so precious and innocent, that they make me cry every time I watch them. He thinks it's weird that they make me cry, but they do. Almost to the point where it hurts to watch them.

They are only five and seven and I feel like I didn't get enough time with them when they were one or two or three or four. I want to go back in time and give their sweet baby heads one more smell.  I want to dress them in their puffy winter suits and tuck them into their strollers under warm cashmere blankets from Tata and go for a walk one more time. I want to hold them in my arms, fresh from a bath, and just kiss and kiss and kiss them. I miss them so much when I watch those videos. Maybe other mothers understand.

Now, Bunny can make her own breakfast. Take a shower all by herself. Text her papa on my phone. Remember things I ask her to tell her teacher. Make her bed more neatly than I can do it.

Wallie loves to help me cook. Asks me to turn the music louder. Writes me letters. Can finally wipe her own bum.

It's too much. Too fast.

(Except the wiping bum part. That's a welcome relief.  She even sprays the bathroom with a few quick bursts of air freshener when she's done which is also muchly appreciated.)

Recently the girls had friends over to play and as I was serving their dessert, one of the girls mentioned calories. I heard Bunny ask, "What's calories?" and I totally cringed inside. "There are good calories and bad calories and if you eat too many you get fat," her friend explained. "If you look on packages of food it will tell you how many calories something has. Then you'll know."

Bunny is very familiar with reading packages. We read packages together all the time at the grocery store but we focus on things like "iron" and "fiber."  We look to see how long the list of ingredients is.  If we can recognize any words. If something contains "high fructose corn syrup" or "sugar." She loves pointing out what's "gluten-free," since so many of her friends have allergies. One thing we don't look for is calories. My emphasis, especially because I have struggled with my weight for most of my adult life, has always been on health, and knowing what good, clean food is.

I don't want my seven-year-old to be counting calories. It's bad enough that because she's so tall, I've had endure adults commenting on her figure ever since kindergarten when she really sprouted. With parents who are 5'9" and 6'4", she's going to be a tall girl any way you slice it. I don't want her worrying if eating too many calories will make her "fat." Not in second grade. I want her to continue joyfully anticipating Saturdays, the day we walk to the farmer's market and choose our food for the week. I want her to continue wanting to go swimming or to practice yoga or to "work out" with her papa or to go jogging with me (a new habit--yes, I've been doing it for several months now so it's officially a habit).

Parenting is like a big square dance. You and your children are partners but every once in a while "Outside Influence" cuts in for a do-si-do or two.  You can allemande left and try to get back on course, but then you allemande right and suddenly your child is partnered with "Independence." Around and around the circle you go until finally your children are right back where they started, with you. Then you all go and have some punch and cookies and talk about the experience. Magical, yes, Dizzying, yes. Growing up, letting go. That, too. And I will, when it's time. Now is not the time. Not when my girls are still so small.

Hannah Montana. Kate Moss. Calories. I swear, you make me want to pick up and move to the mountains of Spain where you can't touch us. At least until Bunny and Wallie aren't so impressionable. Like when they're 40.

Let's meal plan together for 12/14/09

Only 11 more days until Christmas (for those who celebrate)! Have you started thinking about what you are serving on Christmas Eve and/or Christmas Day?

I know that some families choose one or the other to "do it up," but my family does it up on both, especially if my mom is in town.  Our own Butler family tradition includes going to Hippie Church after dinner to sing carols (one of the few times of year we say the word Jesus in our church) and then we end the night by cruising our city's Christmas Tree Lane (which, if you live near Palo Alto, I highly recommend you do). But more on Christmas as we get closer to Christmas.  I'm getting ahead of myself. I can't help it, though! I just love Christmas!

This week, in terms of meals, we're keeping it mellow.  I didn't go to the Farmer's Market on Saturday because it was raining and my mom comes into town tomorrow, so we're playing it fast and loose.

• Monday--Wild salmon, rice, salad
• Tuesday--Chicken tortilla soup (have some in the freezer) with fixin's (chopped avocado, cilantro, cheese)
• Wednesay through Friday--not sure yet. I have stuff on hand for a veggie pasta, lots of salad ingredients, and frozen meaty soup bones from the farmer's market last week and I might make a big pot of beef-veggie or mushroom-barley soup.
• Saturday--We're having an intimate holiday dinner with friends and I'm making a big pot of braised oxtails and a vat of creamy polenta.  We're also having lots and lots of red wine.

How about you? I want to hear all about what your cooking, baking, and making as we head into the holidays. Especially if you are making edible gifts!

This is the week that 5-year-old Wallie became a writer.

This is the week that 5-year-old Wallie became a writer.
Originally uploaded by citymama

[Click on the photo to see it larger with notes "translating" her writing.]

Wallie's Daisy troop is keeping track of good deeds, and this afternoon she sat down to write them on her special Daisy name tag. I gave her no help except to say, "Do your best guess spelling," every time she asked me how to spell a word.

This is the same approach I took as an elementary teacher, the same approach I took with Bunny. It never ceases to amaze me how close they get to a word if they just try to spell it themselves. And if I can read it, hey, we're communicating, kid.

Emergent writing is a beautiful, beautiful thing.

Meal Planning Monday for 12/7/09

Here's what I'm cooking up this week. The [*] indicates locally grown or sourced items, organic when possible.

• Monday--Not so much cooking as a leftovers smorgasboard. The girls will have leftover tortellini and ravioli from Friday night's take out, J. and I will have leftover vegetarian Indian food, and we all will have a fresh spinach* salad with crumbled feta* and broccoli.*
• Tuesday--Beef* stew (made with Pampero Ranch grassfed, pastured beef). I'm using my favorite recipe.
• Wednesday--Caramelized onion* + gorgonzola quiche, sautéed chard*
• Thursday-- Roast pastured chicken*, roasted purple cauliflower*, creamy polenta
• Friday--movie night
• Saturday--not sure yet
• Sunday--Chanukah dinner with friends. I'm providing the DIY burritos, they'll provide the menorah and gelt.

How about you?

Farmer's Market Haul 12/5/09

Farmer's Market Haul 12/5/09 (not shown: apples and eggs)
Originally uploaded by citymama (click photo to see it bigger with notes)

I spent about $90 at the farmer's market this week, more than I usually spend, and it's because I bought 2.5 pounds of beef and 3ish pounds of pastured chicken in addition to my weekly veggies, and bread. That doesn't seem like a lot of food for $90 but I can do a lot with it, and everything will get eaten one way or another.

The beef vendor sells pastured chickens which I didn't realize until the season is almost over. I'm going to try this one and see how it is. If it's good, I might join their chicken CSA which starts in the spring, and can pick up my chicken at the farmer's market which is convenient.

If you live in Silicon Valley are interested in joining the chicken CSA, let me know and I can put you in touch with the farmer. You only have to commit to one chicken a month during the season which is roughly April thru Nov/Dec (but be prepared to spend about $30 for it). You can pick up at Palo Alto or Mountain View farmer's markets.

I thought I'd start posting how much I am spending on food and what I do with it in case that might be helpful for people. What's shown is about what I can use up in a week. We go through about a loaf of bread and a dozen eggs a week. The beef I'll make into stew with the carrots, onion, celery (I have some from last week), and red rose potatoes. I'll roast the chicken and we might have that with the chard or the purple cauliflower. If not, the purple cauliflower will make a yummy pasta with carmelized onions, crushed dried chilis, and conchiglie. We also eat a ton of salad, easily two pounds of mixed greens a week. We use a head of garlic a week, too.

I rarely throw out produce--we eat everything we buy. What I do end up throwing away are things like half-eaten bags of tortilla chips or crackers. Or pita bread or corn tortillas that go bad before we can finish them. We just can't ever seem to finish a bag of chips or box of crackers before they go stale. We definitely prefer fresh foods in this family. Not a bad thing.

Have you seen Food Inc? If so, how did it affect you?

I haven't really been cooking since Thanksgiving for a couple of reasons. The first is that I've been swamped with work (which is a really good thing for our Little Agency That Could), but the second is because after I saw Food Inc., I've been rethinking everything about what we eat, what companies I want to support, and what I want my kids to know about food.

I want to say that I'm completely done with shopping for food in grocery stores. I want to say that 100% of our produce will come from small, organic farms with sustainable farming practices. I want to say that I'll only buy meat and poultry that is organic, pastured, and from farms who treat their workers with dignity and respect. I want to say that we'll immediately start barrel gardening on our back patio.

I want to say all these things and believe it can be a reality. That my insane schedule and our budget and our values can make this true. I just don't know how possible it will be, but I will try.  This is my intention now and for the new year and forever.

The viewing of this movie (and my subsequent devouring of Joel Salatin's Everything I Want To Do Is Illegal) are just the most recent forms of media that are informing my decision. This revelation has been a long time in the making. First there was Upton Sinclair, John Robbins, Alice Waters, and Cesar Chavez. There was Angelo Pellegrini, Michael Pollan, Eric Schlosser, and Barbara Kingsolver. There was Sicko and Capitalism: A Love Story and King Corn.

There was the Slow Food movement and Greens and living in Portland and remembering my own family food values--how I was raised--beginning with all the gardens we had when I was a kid. Wherever we lived, my mom planted a garden. From Hawaii to California to Oregon, our houses had gardens. I remembered eating arugula from our garden in Hawaii when I was just a kid, when no one knew was arugula was. I thought about the running joke in our family about how someone always found a worm in their salad. How my mom always made her spaghetti sauce from scratch. I never tasted sauce from a jar until I was an adult.

It's no trouble for me to shop at my local farmer's market. It's 3 blocks from my house, every Saturday morning.  There is a sustainable beef seller there as well as a fishmonger, and egg, cheese, and olive oil vendors. I just need to do it more. We need to accept that, yes, it's more expensive, but it's a sacrifice we're ready and willing to make.

I am even going one step further. For a week now, I've been researching pastured chicken CSA shares because I will never eat another commercially grown chicken again. I'm even more excited about the sheep's milk, yogurt, cheese, and lamb CSA that J. and I gifted each other for our 15 year anniversary.  We should be getting those first batches of cheese and yogurt in early spring.

If you haven't seen the Food Inc., I highly recommend it, but prepare yourself to be outraged and incensed--even if you thought you already knew how scary the food industrial complex was. If you're afraid to watch it because of what you might learn, all the more reason to see it. None of us can afford to remain in the dark. You will never be able to hear the words Tyson, Cargilll, Swift, Monsanto, and Smithfield without having your blood boil. You will never look a bagged supermarket chicken or spinach or your holiday ham in the same way. After you watch it, let me know.

Of course, all of this thinking about food and where it comes from and how it gets to our dinner tables has me thinking about other things too. Like how my blog might be a platform for more good. How we can all work together to make sure that everyone can afford good, clean, food. I won't stop sharing my recipes or meal-planning with you, but suddenly, that's not enough.

It's a lot to consider at the end of the year when my brain is so full of work and planning for the holidays in addition to keeping the day-to-day details that go along with raising a family in check, but I wanted to share what I've been thinking.  And, of course, I'd be delighted if you shared what you've been thinking, too. Especially if and when you see the movie.

Dear Santa 2009

I shake my fist at you and your commercials, PBS Kids Sprout!!!

Turkey soup where the leftover stuffing--not the turkey--gets to be the star

I have to admit that while I love Thanksgiving, I'm not really a fan of turkey, especially leftover turkey. I have a few small slices of dark meat with my turkey dinner, and I might pick a few more bites of the carcass, but I don't look forward to turkey sandwiches, salads, casseroles, and soup for days. 

I do love soup though, just not turkey soup with the usual starches--noodles or rice. Today I was looking for a quick and easy soup to make with the turkey bones and stumbled upon this recipe for turkey vegetable soup with stuffing dumplings.

The stuffing dumplings are brilliant because they are seasoned enough (mmm, salty, herby goodness) to stand up to the slightly gamey turkey broth. I used twice as many carrots and celery for the soup (because I like a carrot-y turkey soup), added in some leftover corn, and made dumplings from the quart container we had of leftover stuffing.  The result was a light, clear soup chock full of veggies (and not so much turkey) and light, fluffy, flavorful dumplings.

Hope you try it!

Saw "Food Inc". over the Thanksgiving holiday. I've been putting it off because I knew it would make me incensed and angry at the food industrial complex in this country and around the world (just as "King Corn" did, just as "Animal, Vegetable, Miracle" did, just as Michael Moore's movies do). I'm now reading "Everything I Want to do Is Illegal," by Joel Salatin of Polyface farms, my new hero. It's the only (purchased) gift I am giving this Christmas.