BLOGHER '06: THIS IS THE LAST POST ON BLOGHER...NO, REALLY

Okay.

I've told you about the pre-parties and shared my Mommy Blogger session notes and showed you who I met, and I know you want to know, "So how was BlogHer, really?"

In a word: overwhelming.

700+ attendees, two-days-worth of sessions spread out across a large hotel, famous speakers, tons of schwag...700+ attendees.

I am so thankful that I had people to walk in with on Day 1 because I am...well, I'm not the most out-going person on the planet. I'm not the loudest, chattiest person at a gathering, in fact, when I am amongst loud and chatty people I tend to move closer and closer to the edge of the room. Once there and try my darndest to melt into the wallpaper. (Yes, I am beating a dead horse by discussing this yet again. But "workshopping topics to death?" Remember?  It's what I do best.)

I think it's beyond cliché to say that people blog because they are better "online" than IRL.  I wouldn't go so far as to say that about myself in general, but there are times when the cliché certainly applies. In most social situations I am actually perfectly un-dorky. I enjoy myself...I love bringing people together.  It's only at huge gatherings that I feel like a foolio.

At BlogHer, I saw the gamut: gregarious bloggers, shy bloggers, confident bloggers, reserved bloggers, bloggers who commanded attention, bloggers who were uneasy in the spotlight, bloggers who looked perfectly at home, and bloggers who seemed a little uncomfortable. Like me.

I don't meet a lot of other bloggers normally. I think I can count on two hands the people I know personally (outside of work) who blog. I think one of the strangest parts of blogging is meeting people who know things about you—intimate details about your life, what your kids look like, what kind of laundry soap you use—and then wondering if you are meeting their expectations. Perhaps some bloggers don't give a shit, but I admit—I think about these things. (...although that's never stopped me from being true to...me.)

"Real-life" friendships develop over time.  You meet in person. You cry on each other's shoulders.  You attend weddings and christenings and birthday parties. Commonalities bubble to the surface eventually, and along the way you get to decide if those commonalities will lead to a closer kinship.

It's not like that when you have a blog and are meeting other people who have blogs.

I was delighted to be at BlogHer for so many reasons. My expectations were simple: I was hoping to connect with fellow bloggers and learn new things, all of which I did. But I was also really uncomfortable being there. I felt extremely exposed. Like "a big zit in the middle of your forehead on your wedding day" exposed.

Suddenly I was confronted with the fact that there were people at BlogHer that knew me only because of what I've been churning out here and elsewhere for the past 2+ years.  And while I know others were probably uncomfortable, too, I felt even more uncomfortable knowing that lots of people were perfectly comfortable (if that makes any sense).

Such is life for someone who would rather meet one person at a time than everyone at once. (Okay, I think I'm done workshopping that particular issue...for now.)

Having said that, I have a stack of cards sitting right in front of me. A testament to the fact that I did "get out there and meet people." Really nice people. It was incredible to see the passion on everyone's faces...especially when the wireless network was kicking everyone off.

But, seriously, women bloggers are a force to be reckoned with. If anyone doubts that, just take a look at the sponsors. And the people lining up to advertise on our blogs. It's a dicey proposition to hand a bunch of opinionated women bloggers with captive audiences some free water, a box of artificial sweetner, and the keys to a sporty convertible. 

What will these women (who control how their households spend its money) say to other women (who control how their households spend their money)? The BlogHer team certainly deserves credit for helping to facilitate that conversation.

Overwhelming.

Now that I've had a couple of days to decompress, I realize that no matter how socially adept or inept we are, underneath it all, "BlogHers" are all the same. We are women who wake up in the morning and have their coffee while checking their feed readers. We are women who have things to say and perhaps no one tell. We are women who are passionate about what we do. We are women who want to be excellent.

But above all: we are women with finely-honed multi-tasking skills.

Everyone had their laptops open and was tapping away during the sessions. In fact, people seemed the most relaxed and comfortable sitting in darkened conference rooms with the light from their monitors illuminating their faces. Out in the bright sunlight everyone looked...a little awkward. But in a good way.

Thank the universe for 12.7" x 10.2" x 1.3" security blankets.

And, really, thank the universe for BlogHer.

Comments

[Momtowolf]

I totally know what you mean. I would of felt the same way. I am kicking myself for not going !! My girlfriend and I were talking and we really should of gone!!!!

I saw your photos and your just lovely....I know we would of been fast friends!!! I to have felt the sting of feeling uncomfortable and it's not always fun.....

[wordgirl]

What a well-balanced recap! I think you've said it all...even though I wasn't there.

[Mother]

Great thoughts, CM. I think people read blogs and expect the folks to be just like them - well spoken, edited, willing to say what's on their mind - but the blogosphere is safe in a way.

I'm very similar to my blog and very comfortable with lots of folks, but I know that many people aren't - however, I think that the folks (as you stated) did a great job of making everyone feel welcome and comfortable.

[Andy]

Am I the only one who feels like I missed Christmas?

[tanyetta]

Andy, I'm with you on this one too. We're LUCKY to have citymama to recap it all for us though. That's a good thing :)

[Mary Tsao]

Love the last line. Amen.

[kathryn, dym]

It was wonderful meeting you in person. What a strange and exciting experience the whole weekend was. I'm so glad I went and so at a loss about how to write about it. Maybe I'll just copy and paste what you said. :)

[Asha]

It was SUCH a pleasure meeting you. I feel like there was so much more to say than there was time to say it. Next time, soon I hope.

[Chase]

I really wish I would have had more time chatting with you. After I so bravely introduced myself to you, and after I so eloquently stuck both feet in my mouth and wanted to die a repeated, horrid death, I wanted to go back and give you another big fat hug and start over.

But I lost all bravery at that point.

Next year, when I'm just beginning to get over it, I'll re-introduce myself. And then I'll buy you a drink. Or a car. Whatever.

It WAS so very nice to finally meet you. :) :) :)

[Lassa]

I'm so disappointed that I didn't get to say hello to you in person at BlogHer. I really wanted to tell you in person how adorable I think your girls are and how much I enjoy your blog. Next time, for sure!
Lassa

[crazedparent]

i'm glad i had YOU to walk into the room with me!! it was fun to meet everyone. i only wish day one hadn't wiped me out enough that i would have made it to day 2!

[JoanneViskup]

Oh how I wish I was there! I'm not an introvert, but I think even I would have been shy around "Rock Stars" like dooce and such. I'll have to make some blogger friends between now and next year 'cause next year I'm goin' honey, next year I'm goin'!

[sweetney]

"But above all: we are women with finely-honed multi-tasking skills."

BINGO!

[Izzy]

It was very nice to so briefly have met with you. It was so chaotic, I didn't get to say much more than hello but it was still a pleasure :)

[CityMama]

To everyone I met: I feel so honored to have made your aquaintance.

To everyone I didn't: You mean I could have had company while I held up the wall paper?!

[Lia]

So true...all of it.

BTW, yes I am in the bay area. Sunnyvale to be exact! Let's do drinks sometime.