If...

Last night, we went out to dinner with friends in Japantown to celebrate my birthday (37 today, woohoo!) and had loose plans to go to a karaoke bar after. We lingered over dinner making up new lyrics to Justin Timerlake's "Sexy Back" and shared our favorite lines from The De-pah-ted, which we had all recently seen. We had some beer and soju cocktails which made us the most hilarious group in the place. Or so we thought.

After dinner we strolled through Japantown wondering what to do next. Someone suggested seeing the Departed again (which actually sounded great) and so at about 9:10PM (we'd look at my friend Bad Kitty's photos on her digital camera to check the time later) we stood in center of the Peace Plaza (a wide-open space in the middle of Japantown) to consider our plans. The karaoke bar was directly across from us. The movie theater was a couple of blocks down. We decided to check the movie time to see when it started, and if it was too late we could circle back to the karaoke bar.

Off we went.

We arrived in front of the movie theaters at 9:20PM and saw that the next showing didn't start until 10PM.  Too late, we decided, so we doubled back to the karaoke bar.  As we approached, we heard sirens. A fire battalion chief's red Suburban sped past us. A police car, sirens blaring, blew by us heading the opposite direction.  We heard sirens and saw more police cars going in different directions and wondered what happened. It seemed like mass confusion.

Bad Kitty and I were walking ahead the boys so we arrived at the karaoke bar ahead of them. As we approached we stopped dead in our tracks. Two women, the bar owners, ran out of the bar in front of us and were screaming hysterically. One of them was on the phone screaming, "Ambulance! Ambulance!" She ran into the street, practically doubled over from hysteria, to direct the long line of police cars, ambulances and fire trucks that had no idea where they were going just a minute before, to the right place.  She pointed frantically across the street to the exact spot where our group had been standing not 10 minutes before.

It was there that we saw a person on the ground right where we had all decided to take a stroll to the theater. And that's when time got all weird and bendy.

We heard the words, "Shooting...shot four times...shot in the head."

Bad Kitty and I stood glued to our spots in front of the karaoke bar. I could hear the women still screaming madly.  I could hear the blare of the sirens as more and more and more police cars drew up.

When I saw the officers rushing into the bar with guns and a rifle drawn, I turned to walk away.

As we rushed back down the sidewalk away from the  karaoke bar, I spun around once more and saw paramedics carrying one gurney to the Peace Plaza. Then three more gurneys were carried into the bar.  And all I could think was, "We were right there....Ten minutes ago we were standing right there where someone got shot. We could have been there, or on the stairs going into the bar, or in the bar itself when the shooting started...Ohmygod we have kids..."

We ducked into a nearby bar to decompress from the experience and sat quietly sipping our drinks and talking about the "what ifs." Ironically, the small, intimate bar was also a karaoke bar, but no one felt much like singing.

We finished our drinks and decided to call it a night.  We had to walk back to the parking garage underneath the Peace Plaza and the entire area had been taped off with crime scene tape.  All the ambulances were gone but you could not miss the huge red stain in the middle of the plaza. Next to it, a young man with a string of wooden beads in his hands sat quietly chanting.

Later on the news we would hear that one person was two people were killed, two others injured in the bar shooting. One arrest had been made.

I keep thinking about what might have happened if we hadn't decided to stray from our plans to sing karaoke and walk down to the movie theater. We'd all seen The Departed before, it's not like we had to see it again. I can't explain it, but when it was suggested as an alternative, it felt like the right thing to do.

I keep thinking about what a difference 10 minutes makes, and how the title of the movie means something completely different to me this morning.

I also keeping thinking, enough with the fucking guns already.

Comments

[gwendomama]

ohwow, stefania. holyeffinshit if i may say so.
my tiny neck hairs are quivering. yes, you have kids. yes, that was one crazy coincidence. makes you believe in LUCK if nothing else.

[gwendomama]

oh yeah, by the way...happy birthday?

[mommy2boys]

Oh my god...wow. That's scary.

[Ms. BL]

Ohmyfuckinggod. What the hell is going on? The world is in such strife...there's so much more of this going on than there was 8 years ago.

I am just happy that you guys and your friends are ok. Very happy.

And Happy Birthday, hugs to you and your babies.

[mad muthas]

scary scary stuff. fate comes just too close for comfort sometimes - but the important this is, it missed. i'll bet your kids got the biggest cuddles that night!

[Nancy]

How completely terrifying. I am glad you and your friends were OK. Stuff like that really makes you contemplative about life in general, huh?

And happy 37. I'll be hitting that exact number myself in about 3 weeks. :-)

[ricardo]

Hello from rio de Janeiro
Congratulation for your birthday.You must be surprised but you have a fan here, very far and unexpected place.

[marielle]

I'm so glad to hear that you're okay! So strange how those "if" things happen sometimes. Happy birthday!

[Ivonne]

Happy belated birthday!

[wordgirl]

Oh my god! I think about stuff like that all the time. I wonder about the timing of certain events and Freud's insistence that there are no accidents. I think about stories where people talke about close shaves with random violence or being in the path of the tornado. I can't decide if it makes me believe more strongly in the presence of God...or if it increases my doubt.

[Carolie]

About the guns? Amen.

Mad Muthas, you said "the important thing is, it missed."

No, it didn't.

Yes, we're grateful that it missed Stephania and her husband and friends, but it didn't miss. Sounds like four people were shot. And that should not happen.

Makes me think of the lyrics to this Cheryl Wheeler song, found here: http://www.cherylwheeler.com/songs/iiwutm.html.

Happy Birthday, Stephania. Glad you are still around to celebrate more.

[CartwheelsAtMidnight]

Wow. That just made my heart hurt.

[L.A. Daddy]

First, happy birthday.

Second, I'm a firm believer in Karma and your consistent good work, good writing, good heart, and good attitude have paid off for you in a big way.

What goes around comes around.

A birthday you won't soon forget.

[weigooksaram]

Wow, that's awful. It must have been so scary. I'm glad you guys are okay.

[Sassafrass]

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh. no.

Those moments when you turn one way instead of another, when you change your plans, when you follow your instinct in a different direction, I've heard Oprah call "God whispers." Whatever it is you believe or what you believe *that* is, it hurts my heart to hear that people were shot and people died. And I feel so grateful that you, my friend, are OK.

Perhaps that this happened on your birthday is not a coincidence at all. Perhaps it is the right day to take pause and look at everything with fresh eyes. Take good care and happy celebrations to you, for you.

[Jennifer]

Holy Shit.

I am glad you are safe and sound. Albeit shaken for sure.

Happy Birthday!

[Jonathon]

I thought that was going to be a birthday post.

Then it scared the shit outta me.

Glad you're alright.

[Mardougrrl]

Wow...happy birthday. Glad you are all fine, but my heart goes out to those killed and their families. :(

[Jules]

J freaked me out when he told me this earlier. I don't know what I would have done if you guys didn't go check that movie...I don't even want to think about it.

You guys still have a nice, full good-karma bucket. You must be doing something right.

Maybe it was "god whispering" or you were "in rythm with the universe" or maybe it was Leo DiCaprio and Jack Nicholson that saved you. What a freaky birthday, hah?

And yeah - fucking NRA.

[Wendy]

Holy shit batman!!!!! Talk about things just working out in your favor. WOW!!!

[Wendy]

Holy shit batman!!!!! Talk about things just working out in your favor. WOW!!!

[honglien123]

I was at Japantown today. My husband called and told me while I was there that people had been shot and killed the night before. I was in shock, peace plaza looked...well, peaceful. There were children playing and men playing hacky sack. The only signs that anything had happened was some left over frayed caution tape which could have meant anything. There were no signs that anything had happened. No one there seemed aware and were happily going about their merry lives. It's amazing to me that they (whomever "they" are) could sweep up tragedy so quickly and easily. I had been happy to be there before I knew of the incident and then afterwards the scene became surreal. I can't believe that you were there. You should write Leo and thank him for the performance worth seeing a second time.

[shel]

stories like this freak me the hell out. everything happens for a reason. so glad you are all safe.

is it me or is the violence getting worse in san fran?

[Beth]

I am freaking out reading your entry. Lately I have have had such a sense of dread. For some reason I am terrified that I am going to die and leave my baby. I can't imagine how terrifying it must have been to experience that. It makes you wonder what force guides us and our decisions.

[Jenny]

Oh my God. How riveting and awful and terrifying.

Life is so fricking fragile.