CityMama™

Blogger, Marketer, Mother: My revised take on the "making money while blogging" thing

Last week I had the pleasure (and truly, it was a pleasure) of attending the Mom 2.0 Summit in Houston, a gathering of marketers, new media-types, and blogging moms. The main reason I wanted to attend the conference was because it was less bloggy and more "marketer-y." Don't get me wrong, I love attending the conferences that focus on blogging, but for the past several years, I've worked hard at transitioning my career from being a professional blogger/blog editor to being an online media consultant who focuses on the marketing side of things (this still includes hiring bloggers, blogger outreach, and social media strategizing). I will always be a blogger, but marketing is what I did before I had kids and it's where my true passion lies.

I went to Mom2 to connect and network. I went to meet other women who do what I do. I am glad I wasn't the only person in the room who raised their hand twice when asked, "Are there any bloggers here?" then "Are there any marketers here?" And I was struck by how many of my peers (like my roomie and partner-in-crime) were in the same situation.

When we first decided that I would stay home with our older daughter, I knew that going from playdate to playground wouldn't be enough to keep me from going bananas. I knew that eventually, as soon as I figured out how to care for, adjust to, and nurture my baby, I would need to figure out how to care for and nurture myself. In 2001-2002, newly pregnant and seeking out experiences of like-minded and like-stated women, I stumbled upon the blog phenomenon. Sometime in 2003, I decided that I wanted to be part of the experiment. There was no such thing as ads on blogs or sponsored posts or vlogging back then. When I started, I had to teach myself HTML in order to be able to post links and photos. But always in the back of my mind I knew that my blog was going to be my bridge to my new work life. I didn't want it to ever be work--after all it was for me mostly--but thought it could lead to something that was. I knew after being at home and setting my own schedule that I could never work in an office (at least full-time) ever again.

So how would I make this work?

We are all Redneck Mommies on the inside. (Yes, you are. Dig deep.)

Do you all know Tanis? I'm sure you do, but in case you don't, go on over and check her out. She has something extra special to celebrate this Valentine's Day.

In honor of her newly expanded family, I am participating in a virtual shower for her.  The first time I met Tanis was at last year's BlogHer conference. It may have been in Chicago, but that was a blur. Anyway, the first time I remember meeting her was last year when the first thing she talked about was boobs. What's not to love?

She calls herself the Redneck Mommy, but whattheheckanutcrack does that mean anyway? We all have a little Redneck in us anyway, don't we? Especially if you're American. Hell, we INVENTED Redneck. If you don't think you have a little Redneck in you, just read on, my friend.

YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK MOMMY IF...
(a compilation that may or may not be based on Stefania's actual life)

You often "forget" to brush your kids' teeth twice a day but tell the dentist that you do, then look thoughtfully surprised when he mentions "excess plaque on the back molars."  Huh? Really? You don't say.

You could eat Spam in some shape or form every day from atop musubi to fried to cut into strips and added into instant ramen. (Feel free to substitute "hot dogs"  or "Vienna sausage" for "Spam.")

Speaking of mystery meat, one of your kid's favorite snacks are Slim Jims. Which your kid's teacher's aide saw you purchasing in bulk at the grocery store.

You've reached for a beer when a soda would do, but it was a light beer so that's almost the same.

You've sprayed on perfume instead of taking a shower. (Applies to kids, too.)

You've hung a shirt in the shower instead of ironing it. And smelled it first to make sure it was clean.

You've put less than $5-worth of gas in your car...

Or paid for groceries with loose change (before Coinstar).

Your kids stumbled upon inappropriate television content (no, not pr0n, SpongeBob) and you let them watch it because you were busy Twittering.

Your kids have chosen their own mismatched, multilayered outfits since they were 2 and you like it that way because you can't be bothered to dress them and as long as they are wearing clothes you don't care.

You've spied a cute, forgotten jacket on the playground and contemplated taking it home. Or did.

You tell your kids that naughty kids live on Alcatraz without their parents. And they believe you.

You start using Santa Claus to encourage good behavior the day after Labor Day.

And maybe well into the New Year.

You've borrowed money from your kids' piggy bank. (And are thankful that Tata hands out 20-dollar-bills.)

You cut your kid's hair so you didn't have to brush it.

You can make a wholesome dinner with a can of tuna as the central ingredient.

You wait until the kids are in bed to eat dessert.

You tell the kids that the watered down vodka drink next to your bed is water while quickly whisking it away so they don't take a sip.

You go to McDonald's more often than you would ever admit. (Once a week, pretty much.)

You work 4 part-time jobs.

You wait until the last minute to check your kid's backpack for notes from the teacher.

Your library fines equal your cable bill.

What I'm trying to say, Tanis, is that you made my day today (and you know why) and we love you. I am so overjoyed for your family I can't even stand it.  A Redneck Mommy is the best kind of mommy. Thanks for being our Queen.

Kisses,
Stefania

I've been nominated for a Divine Caroline "love this site" award!

So many great sites have been nominated that yes, it is an honor just to be in their company. Yay! I'm flattered!  Please vote if you are so inclined. You have register first but it took me 45 seconds even with the three mistakes I made and had to correct.

A dream, my dream, come true

I'm going to be a published author.

As in a published author in a real, live, honest-to-goodness, bound book. That can sit on a shelf. In a bookstore. Or in a house. That I can show my kids. And they can show their kids. For which we will be having a local signing/par-tay  because this (for me) is HUGE. (More on that later).

I have an essay that will be included in a soon-to-be-published "mommy blogger" anthology edited by Rita Arens: Sleep Is For the Weak. Please read Rita's take on how it came about here. The book has been a long time in the making and no one has worked harder to make it happen than Rita.

Rita: THANK YOU. You are made of one million awesomes. I don't know how else to say it.

I'm in great company alongside these lovely and talented ladies and gents:

Amalah
Binkytown
Birdie's New Mexico Time Machine
Finslippy
Friday Playdate
Fussy
IzzyMom
Laid-Off Dad
Mom-101
Mommy Needs Coffee
Mommytrack'd
Motherhood Uncensored
Not Calm (dot com)
Paper Napkin
Rancid Raves
State of Grace
Surfette
Surrender, Dorothy (our esteemed and hard-working editor)
Sweetney
The Modernity Ward
The Naked Ovary
Three Kid Circus
Woulda Coulda Shoulda

Sleep Is For The Weak begins with a foreward by Stacy Morrison, Editor-in-Chief of Redbook magazine.

Our book is now available for pre-order from these fine purveyors:

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

BookSense (a collection of independent booksellers and my personal preference for ordering copies)

I would love it if you pre-ordered the book so my mom's pre-order isn't hanging out all by its little lonesome. Support your favorite blogger parents! Let's all show Rita just how much all her hard work has paid off!

I cannot wait to have this in my hands.

Blog Reader Appreciation Day on April 16!

My blog pal Robin over at The Other Mother is putting together a very sweet blog event to show appreciation for everyone who reads blogs: Blog Reader Appreciation Day!

If you'd like to participate, please hop on over to her site and let her know, then on Wednesday, April 16, write a post showing how much you love your commenters. (Robin will be posting ideas.) Say it loud, say it proud: we love our commenters!

Please spread the word!

Bossy came to visit us in West Heaven

Bossy was here.

And then she wasn't.

She stayed long enough for me to wish that I lived where she does or that she lived here. She slept in the guest room/playroom/office with 3,289 pastel-colored, sparkly plastic horses to keep her company. She stayed long enough for Bunny and Wallie to wonder why Aunt 'Bossy' wasn't there when they got home from school. We ruined her for any other frozen yogurt. On purpose. So she'll come back.

We had a bloggy get together at Bad Kitty's where I got to meet VDog (Finally! shoot.) and Andrea who made emu and I ate it and it was good.

I'm finding I don't take pictures of these kinds of momentous events anymore. My aunt never brings a camera on vacation because she says she wants to create memories in her head. I think I agree. My head is full of Bossy. No camera needed. Plus, there's always flickr.

Aunt Bossy, someday, I want to bring pasta salad to your potluck party.

Lucky Portlanders, you got 'er next!

PSA: Is Blog Net News scraping your site?

The scrapers are at it again.

Blogger click over to BNN and see if they are syndicating your content without your permish. Blogs are sorted by category, parent bloggers go here to see if your blog is listed.

If it is, read this post by Erin Kotecki Vest on how to get your blog removed. She got BNN to remove her blog and assured the editor, David Mastio (who is no saint), that more bloggers would be contacting him. (His email is in her post.)

For those that need more of an explantion of this general issue and why it's so frustrating, read Jaelithe's post.

Spaghetti "Fauxs"

Patti makes these which is where I got the idea. I bought the ring-shaped pasta from Trader Joe's (a place from which I try not to buy pasta because, despite its cheap-ness, I just don't dig the quality of most of the brands they carry.)

I keep pastina shapes on hand for soups and don't usually serve them as a meal in themselves unless I am making orzo salad. The girls request broth with alphabets or stars or acini di pepe (which looks like buck shot) when they are sick.

I tossed the O's with marinara and, after the photo was taken, a grating of pecorino. I try to always have a box of Pomí marinara around for short-cuts and/or quick meals. It tastes a lot like homemade to me. (Make sure you get the marinara and not the strained or chopped tomatoes because the boxes look very similar and I've made that mistake before.)

My kids are the weird kids who have never tasted bottled Ranch dressing and who don't know what real (canned) Spaghetti-O's are.  I was calling this dish Spaghetti-O's as I was serving it, but they insisted on calling it "Cheerios." Works for me. And I hope, for you.

The girls both liked this dinner, and we had enough leftover that Bunny took it twice to school for lunch. I warmed up a serving then packed it in her Thermos and sent her off with a little container of cheese and a spoon.

I served the Spaghetti-O's with buttered peas which "someone" apparently tried to outsource to Ugly Doll.

Not your mother's mommy anthology

This is great news!  Thanks for all your hard work and persistence, Rita, you rockstar!

PR people are sitting up and taking notice because of us

Apparently PR folks are shocked to find out that we're onto them. Some important conversations are being had all over the blogosphere and, dare I say, within the PR companies themselves.

(By the way: Welcome to my blog, PR people!)

If you are a blogger that get PR pitches (or even if you don't...yet) please consider what these people are asking you to do. They are asking you to market their clients' products (albeit they are taking a risk by contacting you) for free. Whether you choose to do it is your decision and your decision alone, but just remember (I'll repeat The MommyBlogger Mantra now): Know your worth.

No one put it better than Mom-101 in response to 1) a bad pitch 2) a PR person brazenly asking her for a discount:

I am pleased you would like to advertise on Mom101. I am not pleased that you are asking for a discount considering it's what, 30 bucks for a week? It would cost more to buy a set of magic markers and make posters.

If you want your brand to have real estate on my blog and reach thousands of women, you are welcome to pay the full price. It is not my job to take a hit on the price if your creative is not compelling, creative, or clear enough to encourage people to click through. As someone with "a lot of experience with blogAds" surely you know that the prices are often paltry and out of step with other advertising programs. Asking mom bloggers - many of whom do this as their only source of income - to cut their rates is unconscionable

I got the same pitch, BTW, and I copied and pasted the above into my response with a note that said, "Yes, we mommybloggers do talk to each other and we're sick of being taken for a ride."

The issue of PR people not pitching to people of color—or worse, only pitching to them if they happen to have the stats to warrant it—is the one issue raised at BlogHer that I can't shake. I can't stop thinking about it, but what I know is this: We need more PR people like David Wescott in the world.  He has some very insightful posts up on his blog right now...and if you care to go through his archives, be sure to set aside about 348 hours reading and thinking time.

Mocha Momma—who got everything rolling in the first place, I'm just assisting—keeps on keepin' on.

Mom-101 is looking out for her peeps (aka you). If you like what she said above, keep reading.

Marriage-101 lays out some groundrules for PR people that should be tacked up above the urinals and in the bathroom stalls of every PR agency in America.

Thank you also to PR person/mom/blogger Susan Etlinger for her commentary.

And everyone (especially PR people) needs to read Lisa Stone's response to the whole deal.

Did you blog this issue?  Want to help foment change? Let me know and I will link you here.  Together, we can force these PR folks to listen to us. My brain didn't stop functioning the moment I had kids.

We have the power, they know it, let's use it.