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10/21/2009

Nothing says OLD like a trip to the gynecologist

The nurse practitioner in charge of the health and well-being of my lady bits is someone with whom I went to high school--but she graduated, like, 10 years after I did.

As if that's not bad enough, at my recent annual exam, the one that coincides with my birthday (in this case, my 40th birthday), I had to endure her talking to me about how my new low dose birth control pills would, "help with the hot flashes that might accompany perimenopause." They would also help with "mood swings and irregular periods" that also might accompany the beginning of "the change."

I am apparently entering the period of a woman's life when her eggs die off and her ovaries shrivel and her body says, "More babies? That's a joke, right?" Apparently I have about 10 more years of birth control pill-taking years left in me before we need to "discuss other options." Please, dear god, let my period dry up by then.

Then she handed me my own "schedule your mammogram" paper. Pink, of course.

One more day until I'm 40, folks.  One. more. day.

Posted at 01:15 PM in Oh yeah, that's gyno-tastik!, Stefania/CityMama |

Comments

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Jenny

Happy Almost Birthday, hot mama.

Posted by: Jenny | 10/21/2009 at 09:07 PM

CharmingBitch

Happy Birthday, momma!!

Posted by: CharmingBitch | 10/21/2009 at 09:50 PM

Al_Pal

Deeeelightful.
[Whatever?]
;p

Happy Birthday!!!!

Posted by: Al_Pal | 10/23/2009 at 02:38 AM

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40 Whatever Approved

Things to Do When We're 40 (The Not Bucket List)

  • A barbecue tour of the South
    We'll start in the Carolinas and end in Texas and sample the best barbecue America has to offer. Why? Because we like meat.
  • Hotel Living
    We like: mini bars, movies, and lounging around in our pajamas with our laptops right where they are supposed to be. We'll bring running shoes to pretend like we're going to work out, but really, who are we kidding. You see where this is going?
  • Knock some sense into dumb people
    We'd love to be the camp counselors on a show like the Real World or Rock of Love.
  • Eating Dinner in a Vineyard While the Sun Sets
    You know those scenes of a dining table set in a Tuscan or Sonoma vineyard dressed with beautiful linens and people sitting around it drinking wine and eating and laughing while the sun goes down? We want to be those people.
  • Yoga Retreat in New Mexico
    Some of our fondest memories are of spending time doing yoga together. Do other wannabe yoginis spend the entire class laughing together? We do.